When I Knew

When you laughed, 
and I flinched, 
that was the moment, 
I didn’t want to believe, 
but my lungs had sunk 
into my gut and I knew. 

When you laughed,  
and I almost told you 
to keep it down, 
I knew I couldn’t ignore 
what I knew, couldn’t pretend 
it didn’t change anything. 
 
When I told you what I knew, 
that was a moment you didn’t laugh.